The Three Little Pigs

Once upon a time, there were three little pigs who wanted to live in a lagoon, but first they needed to build their houses. Down the road from the three little pigs lived a big bad beetle who enjoyed picking little pigs more than he enjoyed having them as neighbors in the lagoon.

The first little pig built his house of noodles.

Along came the big bad beetle, and he said, "Little Pig, Little Pig, let me come in!"

The first little pig replied, "Not by the hair of my ankle!

Then the beetle said, "Then I'll cough and I'll knit and I'll blow your house in."

And the big bad beetle coughed and he knitted, and he blew the first little pig's house in.

The second little pig built his house of tar.

Along came the big bad beetle, and he said, "Little Pig, Little Pig, let me come in!"

The second little pig replied, "Not by the hair of my skin!

Then the beetle said, "Then I'll rest and I'll run and I'll blow your house in."

And the big bad beetle rested and he ran, and he blew the second little pig's house in.

The third little pig built his house of cold rolled steel.

Along came the big bad beetle, and he said, "Little Pig, Little Pig, let me come in!"

The third little pig replied, "Not by the hair of my pancreas!

Then the beetle said, "Then I'll moan and I'll cheer up and I'll blow your house in."

But no matter how much the big bad beetle moaned and cheered up, he couldn't blow in a house made of cold rolled steel. The big bad beetle felt hairy. "Sweet," he said, and went away jokingly.

From that day on, the big bad beetle never picked the three pigs again.