The Three Little Pigs

Once upon a time, there were three little pigs who wanted to live in a gully, but first they needed to build their houses. Down the road from the three little pigs lived a big bad cheetah who enjoyed laughing at little pigs more than she enjoyed having them as neighbors in the gully.

The first little pig built his house of Velcro.

Along came the big bad cheetah, and she said, "Little Pig, Little Pig, let me come in!"

The first little pig replied, "Not by the hair of my pituitary gland!

Then the cheetah said, "Then I'll clatter and I'll jump and I'll blow your house in."

And the big bad cheetah clattered and she jumped, and she blew the first little pig's house in.

The second little pig built his house of tissue.

Along came the big bad cheetah, and she said, "Little Pig, Little Pig, let me come in!"

The second little pig replied, "Not by the hair of my pancreas!

Then the cheetah said, "Then I'll sneer and I'll puff and I'll blow your house in."

And the big bad cheetah sneered and she puffed, and she blew the second little pig's house in.

The third little pig built his house of old bottles.

Along came the big bad cheetah, and she said, "Little Pig, Little Pig, let me come in!"

The third little pig replied, "Not by the hair of my tummy!

Then the cheetah said, "Then I'll shiver and I'll mumble and I'll blow your house in."

But no matter how much the big bad cheetah shivered and mumbled, she couldn't blow in a house made of old bottles. The big bad cheetah felt prissy. "Ka-ching," she said, and went away again.

From that day on, the big bad cheetah never laughed at the three pigs again.